July 12th and 13th: When Country Versus Club.

ticket and training pass :)

oh epic days that i live to see and enjoy.

I am so thankful that they decided to come to Malaysia :) and that i had the opportunity to be there :) 

i regret like MAD for not stalking them at their hotel, and going for the signing session, not sitting near the tunnel during training, not having binoculars, not having an arsenal jersey, not buying (fake) arsenal merchandise from the game, not taking enough pictures and all that.

bimbo moment: but OMG i was there! with people around me that love arsenal! (not joel and joseph lah -_-) and in the same country! i breathe the same oxygen as them! theo walcott and wenger waved at our direction! D: isn't it mind blowing? :D

i'll start from the very beginning. as you can see, i just deleted the events page, since it's so fragile. 

so events will continue on being posted here. in excruciating detail, i'm warning you. 

joseph, faya and i went to buy tickets at pyramid but it was sold out already. so before joel joined us, we asked him to detour to parade and buy there. 

he said can buy, but if we wanted training passes, we'd have to go to the curve and buy. he'd book for us first.

then on sunday ini punya joel dungu han didn't go and take on saturday, so faya and i emo. budden joel dungu han suddenly called and say still got, and he bought adi. hehe :)

so, the day came.

July 12th, training.

for once i'm excited to get up, and go to school, and be done with it. after school, cheryl and schewee needed to make a detour to mydin to buy stuff for their class for hari karnival.

omg, i think my mom is making muffins now *happy*

anyway, we went. round. and round. bought stuff. and then the time was 4 before i even realized it. and then i rushed them.

cause joel was coming at 5. and i needa shower and change, and if possible, eat.

reached home at 4.30. shower. i think i took up more time deciding what to wear. -_-

then a maggicup lah since rushing. then joel came first. then had to wait for rajasingam riiight.

then he came and we went to fetch faya!

it was really jam there. so we parked far off. and walked. 

we got seats opposite the tunnel and benches. didn't know the other side would have been much better -_-

almost died when they came out of the tunnel. lol, no binoculars. alot of squinting, pointing, and giggling with faya. 

the first to come out was gunnersaurus. ahhhh you lovable dinosaur. thank goodness arsenal didnt use a large animated cannon or something like that for their mascot -_-

walcott was by far the friendliest one, with all the waving.

dunno whether the guys were bored or not :/

then we walked back to the car, about 10ish i think. or earlier.

saw an accident. we didn't want to be so kepoh so we didn't stay and gape like everybody else lah.

went to eat mien dui mien for dinner! muahaha :D

matchday, July 13th

the next day, in school, i could rant like a silly girl to bryan. hahaha.

i went home, and ate a big lunch, cause i didn't wanna get hungry at the game and spend money there unnecessarily. thats the cool way of saying I'M BROKE D:

joel picked faya and i up and we headed to the kelana lrt station at 4.30 and meet jozef :)

everywhere there was people in arsenal jerseys. :D

all i had was an arsenal cap. malu :(

reached the stadium at 7 D:

decent place to sit lah i guess. dumb smokers. -_-

well.

first they came out to train. omg :) oh yeah! and faya brought binoculars BD

arsenal's training was super organized, compared to malaysia's one, which looked like a failed pj warm up.

the crowd was noisy, and excited. as annoying as the horns were, it did help the atmosphere. i guess. kinda. i will kill them. i'm very sorry i don't actually know many arsenal chants, except the very creative "arsenal, arsenal, arsenal, arsenal" and the totally impartial "we've got cesc fabregas" song.

the crowd did sing samir na-nasri, which he annoyingly didn't really respond to.

i was abit upset that we didn't sing negaraku first. i envy the kids up front with the players. the p.a is very bad.  and it was hot.

the match started, and wow, it's a real different feeling when you support both teams :) you get to cheer both on :D

all the goals were awesome, except maybe the penalty, cause, well, it was a penalty.

it's okay though, aaron ramsey <3

it would have been amazing if fabregas came, how dare he get injured and ruin this experience for me >:(

pictures still with faya. :/

anyway, i'll never forget this experience. so cliched, but it's true isn't it? now i just have to go to the emirates. and just at least, touch aaron ramsey. or whoever else. :)

thanks faya, for jakun-ing with me. thanks joseph and joel, for being our bodyguards, and for not totally criticizing arsenal.

<3

however though, i have to i feel my love for them fading :( last season ended off so sourly for me. 

it's getting quite bad. i used to spend hours on their website reading everything.

all i see now is, the same stuff i've been seeing for years. 

hypocritical quotes and saying we'll do something about it, and yet not doing anything is infuriating. and this time, pre season isn't even getting me excited. i think this is going to be a 'liverpool-esque' season.

august 13th babes. it's coming.

 (somebody buy me an arsenal jersey LAH)

when life gives you lemons, demand for peaches.

sigh, you know most of the time i'm completely content that i'm single and that i can't even consider at all being in a relationship right now or for sometime. but sometimes, (i think around period time lah) all i can think about is having a boyfriend.

it'll be worth it when everything's just right you know, i don't want a silly, temporary yet heartbreaking relationship. no such thing as, "we'll figure it out later".

i don't need a boyfriend. anything that you need to have from having a boyfriend i already have from all my best friends. except if i want to do more than hug lah, but if that's want you want from a boyfriend then i think your motives are all wrong D: hamsap you.

i just need a constant reminder of this. phoooooooooooooooooo.

i have God anyway.
:)

oh, and i get lots of love from bruce wayne when i pet him. :) PET HIM.

whatever makes you happy.

sigh. i realize now why i've been emoing AT my blog. because there are so many things i gotta write here, but since the day it lost some of my posts, i've been boycotting it. 

see, at first i thought of why i need to blog. nobody really blogs anymore. is there some sort of stupid desperate need i have that others have already overcome?

then i rationalized that i write to express my thoughts, feelings and events without literally telling anyone. and to keep memories. 

so if that's true, is it okay to be that attached and take it that seriously? i mean, i am honestly upset that blogger lost my posts. 

:(

well, i have a theory. 

i think i have a mild separation anxiety disorder. i'm not trying to dramatize the situation or anything, i'm trying to understand it. and OF COURSE it's not just regarding this. just read on, and try not to roll your eyes.

separation anxiety disorder, or s.a.d (haha, i didn't realized the coincidence) er, wait, i copy paste from wikipedia for you :)

Separation anxiety disorder is a psychological condition in which an individual experiences excessive anxiety regarding separation from home or from people to whom the individual has a strong emotional attachment (like a father, mother, grandparents, and brothers or sisters). Separation Anxiety Disorder (SAD), is characterized by significant and recurrent amounts of worry upon (or anticipation of) separation from a child or adolescent's home or from those to whom the child or adolescent is attached.

Those suffering from SAD may worry about losing their parents and/or getting lost or kidnapped. They often refuse to go to certain places (e.g., school) because of fears of separation, or become extremely fearful when they are left alone without their parents. These children and adolescents may also refuse to sleep alone, experience nightmares about separation, or experience various physical complaints (e.g., body-aches, nausea) when separated from their parents. Separation anxiety may cause significant impairment in important areas of functioning, (e.g., academic and social). 

1. my unhealthy attachment to my ex-classmates and ex-school is definitely something other than just unhealthy. i know we all miss each other, but sometimes i feel terribly desperate to see you all. and the weird thing is, i also desperately want to see people i'm not even that close with. seafield is not a bad school, and neither are my new classmates, but somehow i can't seem to grasp that. everyones making new friends, but i can't do that cause it's not easy. 

at first i thought i was shy, ptuh since when am i shy, then i thought maybe i just need to get used to it, but it's been like 2 months! 

2. that same desperate yearning to see people also continues. my attachment to my church friends. all of you. close, kinda close, and not-so-close :) i enjoy my weekends like crazy (that's why i can't get any homework done) and then it crashes onto a monday. and i feel like i haven't seen them forever. then wednesday when i see nat, nick, steph, jeannie and mae i feel much better. then fridays aren't so bad cause i know i'll be seeing them at night. and if i miss a day at church, like yesterday, i feel so much emptier. 

3. i also can't imagine living away from my family, my house, usj. i can't imagine going off for studies and not being able to sleep in my bed and pee in my own toilet. that i can't see my family. or that i would miss weekends in church. anything more than a week and i think i'd go nuts.

4. death affects me unnaturally too. i'm not scared OF death, i'm scared because they won't be here anymore. be with the one's they love. i cry when i read about death in books. so dumb. movies are okay to cry cause there's sad music and i'm sure other people are emoing too. but still. i think my boggart would form either someone close dying, or a cockroach. either. 

5. i think it's also why i'm suddenly attached to soft toys again. the most clean one being my soft toy cow, with no name. i'm not usually into soft toys, or cows. but now i sleep with my cow. because i think i'll feel less lonely. i think lah :) sometimes i think that's why i want a pet so much. not just because i like animals, but to reduce my loneliness. and a pet fish. see. 

6. i also almost always dream of my old friends. and about getting lost or someone chasing me. i think this is unrelated. anyhooooooooo :)

so. quite pathetic right? i know. but it definitely explains alot. this is beyond just nostalgia, it's some sort of condition. and wow, if i didn't have God, i'd probably be in a mental hospital already. 

how else can i describe my almost painful aching desperate hope of going back into the past? 

:)

i'm so loser right i know :D haha. 

see how much i love you all. you better love me back. these are early symptoms of serial killers.

:) bai!

and blog, i forgive you. but if you do it again, i will go to wordpress.